To whom it may concern.

I’ve done nothing but try and make things work. You say you want to start over and make things right. You say you want us to be what we once were. Yet you ignore the effort I put into it. I try to join you, I ask you to participate, you blow me off. Starting over in a relationship implies there’s still a relationship between us, but you don’t seem to see how one-sided it is.

You shy away at my slightest touch. You won’t hold me, you won’t sit with me to watch a show or play a game. But when it comes to them, and you know to whom I refer, you show no hesitation in laying on their shoulders, sleeping with your head nestled into their chests. That does not fix a relationship.

How much can you truly mean when you say you love me? Are you leading me on, playing games with my emotions? Was he right when he said I’m just your new toy that you’d so quickly grow weary of? I feel almost cheated out of months of my life; months in which I’ve done nothing but sacrifice time and energy to ensure your health, your comfort, and your happiness. And now you treat my efforts as though they were nothing, showing not a single shred of appreciation.

I try to explain how I feel, but each word that I speak, you shoot down. You try to rationalize your blind and selfish deeds by shoving your past relationships down my throat. I am in no way attempting to control you through what I say, but you always find a way to make it sound as if I’m threatening you with words that never pass my lips. Just because I show concern does not mean I’m tearing you down. It simply means I’d like to talk. To overcome these obstacles that lay before us. But you’re too blind to see. You’re too convinced my every action, every word, is made with ill intent.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s